Q.O.S. (Queen Of Spades)
Kink Or Racism?
This article was originally submitted by Eden After Dark to Lifestylers Magazine for their Bi-June issue 2021. However within 48 hours there were so many nonsensical comments from random readers (Not to mention some ill founded allegations from a delusion ex girlfriend) Lifestylers Magazine was left with little choice but to remove it.
However, Eden After Dark will proudly post it to their BLOG and will be delighted to willfully engage in respectful and pithy conversations / dialogue regarding the subject matter. As it is very controversial. Discussing matters in a respectful way brings forth change so that we are not doomed to repeat our mistakes. Attacking what we do not agree with accomplishes nothing. So, without further delay. Happy reading !
- Christian Owner/CEO Eden After Dark Group
Queen Of Spades more commonly known in the Swing Lifestyle as “QOS”. For those readers who are not familiar with this particular reference. A “QOS” oftentimes synonymous with a “Snow Bunny” is a White woman who allegedly prefers to nearly or completely exclusively have sexual interactions with Black men. In almost all instances said woman is married to a White gentleman. The question is, is this a Kink/Fetish or is it subtle racism? In this writer’s opinion. It’s the latter whether intentional or not. Let’s dive into this “lifestyle” a wee bit deeper. The QOS lifestyle has recently taken over the swing lifestyle scene and the mainstream adult film industry like wildfire. Why is that? I asked myself this question several times then realized it’s what I refer to as “The iPhone effect”. That is, few people purchase an iPhone for its features or technical specifications. iPhones are simply tech from other manufacturers reassembled into a cute very marketable case. The actual hardware is years behind others. Most purchase an Iphone because why? Well, because their friends have it. It’s little more than subliminal peer pressure, or wanting to fit in. The same I believe is applying to most of these alleged Queen Of Spades.
Open any porn site, any of the hubs, the tubes etc. They have been overrun by QOS content.
(I will give props where they are due BLACKED.com does some absolutely amazing things with a camera. The angles, the lighting, and the sets are all incredible.) It’s what all of the cool kids are doing at the moment. It’s very reminiscent of when White men were obsessed with Asian women a few years back. What’s sad is I believe a lot of these women are entering this lifestyle simply to please their husbands, and not because they genuinely enjoy it. Same reason almost all women in the Swing Lifestyle allege they are Bisexual. To please their husbands and or boyfriends. Now, wherein is the line between a preference, a kink or racism? That’s a tough question. In my personal opinion, if you’re fetishizing a group of people or a person simply because of their race. Well, that’s just another form of racism. This particular form is beginning to erode at the very foundations of the swing lifestyle. I don’t wish to bore you with a long list of reasons (which I do have) but, here are just a few. This alleged lifestyle has blurred the lines with many long established roles/dynamics. Mainly cuckolding, hotwifing, and Stag/Vixen dynamics. Its has become mainstream now to think of cuckolding or hotwifing as a White wife having sex with Black men whilst in a committed relationship with a White man. This is absolutely incorrect.
I would encourage anyone with questions regarding these roles and terms to visit my club’s website EdenAfterDark.com and read through our Lifestyle Resources section to become more familiar with them. Who knows perhaps some of the kinks and roles listed there are just what you’ve been dreaming of.
I recently (within this past year) lost a prominent role in a very large non profit organization in Las Vegas because of the Queen Of Spades lifestyle. It seems as if an entire boardroom agreed with me that this lifestyle is indeed a form of racism. At the time I was residing with a married couple in a beautiful home here in Vegas. A well known couple, lifestyle club owners in fact.
She is a self proclaimed Queen Of Spades although on one occasion she claimed it was just a “facade” for her online persona for Only Fans. Which I didn’t buy for a moment. A non profit board I sat on for many years became aware of us residing together and voted to depose me for and I quote “Living off of the shared earnest of a suspected racist”. And you know what? They were absolutely right! They were absolutely accurate. Imagine walking into a room with fifteen of your professional peers and on the wall is a projection of your roomies OnlyFans and Twitter content blasted upon the wall larger than life. Then being asked if you are a racist as well. It was absolutely humiliating. The so-called Queen Of Spades lifestyle is indeed a form of racism and morally wrong. Is it woefully malicious, typically no. Is it a form of racism, yes.
There is an even deeper subset of QOS wherein they are actively on film making claims of “Black Superiority” and “Breeding White women until there is no longer a White race.” Some of the material becomes very… for lack of a better word, dark. This is all proliferating at a time in our country wherein racial tensions are higher than they have been in the past thirty years. I, briefly discussed this Q.O.S. Lifestyle with my mother to get another opinion on the matter. She was victim of race riots when she was a child in 1969. At the age of five she was brutally beaten and nearly crushed to death amongst a group of protesters in Omaha Nebraska. When I explained this lifestyle to her (mind you I had to explain it to her three times before she could wrap her head around it) and asked her opinion, she agreed it is indeed a form of racism.
As swing lifestylers we are in a very unique position. It’s similar to the LGBT community wherein we have an obligation and a duty to be welcoming and accepting to all walks of life. Whether that’s racial, gender, sexual identification etc. Our cause, our lifestyle, is slowly becoming more accepted across the world and in the United States which is extremely sexually repressed and stymied. And that is an amazing wonderful thing. However, sometimes we get carried away with a thing or two. We don’t take the time to pause and consider if this is potentially hurting someone whether it be directly or indirectly. What effects will this have down the line? Am I doing this because I myself truly enjoy it, or have I directly or indirectly been pressured and swayed into it?
Enjoy your kinks, live YOUR truth but, take a moment to think and ensure its not hurting anyone directly, or indirectly. Is it hurting a cause or a movement? If the answer to any of these is “yes” then you should probably think twice before partaking.