Life has been on the upswing for you since beginning your swingers’ relationship with your partner or spouse…well, until lately. The two of you have made friends with other swingers. You meet up with this couple every now and again, and you can’t help but notice your partner has chemistry with one of them.
Now you find yourself overanalyzing every little interaction between them, sexual or not. What do you do in such a situation? In this article, we’ll give you some tips and pointers for keeping jealousy out of your swinging life.
1. Know You’re Not Alone
It’s not abnormal to feel jealousy towards another person, even in an open relationship like a swingers’ lifestyle. Lots of other swingers have been in your shoes before and survived it.
Hiding your feelings won’t resolve any issues. In fact, you could start to experience bitterness and hatred towards your partner the longer the matter goes unresolved. In the meantime, they don’t even realize there’s anything wrong.
That’s why it’s so important to…
2. Express Your Feelings to Your Partner
Jealousy is an ugly thing, and the thought of expressing it can make you feel incredibly embarrassed. That’s understandable, but we just discussed what happens when you hide your jealousy. As hard as it is, you need to sit down with your partner and have a frank discussion with them.
A good partner will reassure you there’s no serious feelings of romance between them and this other swinging partner. You may feel better at this point just from a conversation. If so, then great.
However, jealousy doesn’t always dissolve with a single chat. That’s okay if yours doesn’t. It just means you need a different solution.
3. Consider Breaking It Off
Listen, at the end of the day, your partnership or marriage matters more than a swinging arrangement does. If your jealousy has lingered for weeks or months, that’s not healthy for you. You need to talk to your partner again. This time, one of you should propose breaking it off with the other swinging couple.
Yes, it’s not always easy to find another couple into the lifestyle, especially one you’re compatible with. If both of you aren’t comfortable with the arrangement, though, then you have to end it. You’ll find another couple to swing with eventually.
4. Get to the Root of Your Feelings
With the matter dealt with, it’s time to get introspective. What made you feel so insecure in the first place? Do you have a history of jealousy or was this the first time it happened? If we’re talking about an isolated incident, then you don’t necessarily have to worry. Some people just trigger the green-eyed monster.
If you have a past fraught with jealousy and insecurity, you might want to spend some time on yourself. Perhaps you make improvements to your looks or lifestyle so you feel better about yourself. Therapy or counseling can also help. Once you feel more secure in yourself, you’ll be more secure in your relationship as well.